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Authenticity

”Thou may be kind, but that doesn’t make thou naive. Thou may be vulnerable, but that doesn’t make thou weak.”

 

Authentic: Not false or copied; genuine; real. Representing one’s true nature or beliefs; true to oneself or to the person identified. 

Authenticity. What does it mean? What does it mean to you? Who are you, when you’re your most authentic self? And why is it, that at times, it makes one feel weak when showing one’s true nature? It makes one feel exposed. Vulnerable. You peeled off all of your layers, you ripped off all of your clothes, standing bare naked, hand in hand with your soul. 

I believe in being genuine. To myself and to the people around me. However, that doesn’t mean that I’ve always succeeded in showing my true self. Far from it. Nonetheless, I can honestly say that there has been a tremendous growth within me when it comes to being honest. And I kinda like that. It makes me feel powerful. Far from weak.

Some people might call me naive. On the verge of being too kind. And as I will always stay true to my kindness and compassionate side, I’ve begun to realise the importance of being kind to myself as well. I’ve learned to set boundaries, and not let people treat me like I’m less than. And it hurts, deep within, knowing that at times I’ve believed that I’m not worthy of real love. Not worthy of honesty and respect. It’s like there’s been a part of me that hasn’t seen my power, my self-worth and wisdom. A part that hasn’t been able to embrace all of it. All of me.

It has taken me a couple of years to finally realise this, and a few months ago when I thought I’d healed from my past, it turned out that, it wasn’t the case. I still had some healing to do, some things to let go of. I had to create space. Space for my true self to enter. Healing is not linear, it’s a process that goes up and down, and down again, before you finally find yourself on the mountain top. It takes courage, and some tough climbing, but trust me; it will be worth it in the end. When you find yourself in similar situations, all over again, it’s time for you to take a step back. Observe, and reflect. It’s time for things to change.

We have one life. One. What the hell are we doing if we’re not enjoying life from our deepest core? Our most authentic self? We need to start enjoying life, not simply live it.

What is more, one important thing to bare in mind is that, although you’re honest and genuine, it doesn’t automatically mean that others will be. You can’t control another person, and you should never take anything a person does or says personally. Everything a person does is because of them, it’s not because of you. And I do understand, that if you’re an empath that you somehow want to help people, you want them to understand the importance of being genuine. The importance of living life truthfully. But how can you expect someone to be honest with you, if they aren’t even honest with themselves? You. Can’t. Change. Another. Person. That’s that person’s job. We’re all responsible of our own life. For our own happiness.

I’ve definitely come to a point in life where I don’t care what people think of me anymore. I don’t compare myself to others, cause how could I? I’m not them, and they are not me. I wish to be me, and I wish you to be you. Isn’t that what makes this life so compelling? That we’re a bunch of humans, although somehow so alike, we have our different traits, up-bringings and weird quirks. We have our different struggles, things to heal and to let go of. If we only knew how much there’s to learn from one another, so much wisdom and clarity to gain from each other. Every human I’ve met thus far I know I met for a reason. Although I’ve let people hurt me in the past, I know that it was something I had to go through, in order to find myself, in order to find my inner strength.

Self-love hasn’t always been a priority in my life, and therefore, I’ve had some hard lessons to learn, in order to finally see my own worth. It’s not narcissistic to love oneself, to take care of oneself. It’s necessary in order to grow and evolve as a human being.

Remember, the people who choose to hurt you are usually the ones suffering the most. The ones carrying the most unhealed pain. In most cases they might not even be aware of the damage they are causing; they are simply unconscious of their actions. However, at times, they know exactly what they are doing; and in those cases you need to remove yourself from their life – you can’t let their pain and suffering harm you anymore. In a way you’re helping them feed their behaviour by staying, or letting them treat you poorly. You might not be able to help them change, however, you have the choice to leave the situation. You have the choice to say ”enough”.

Happy and peaceful people don’t walk around destroying other people’s lives. Therefore, be kind to the unkind. Nevertheless, never let them treat you like a doormat. Know your worth. You’re a beautiful human, filled with love and compassion. And trust me when I say, I know how hard it can be to live in a world where showing emotions is regarded as weak. A world where people take advantage of your kindness. But don’t let them. Stand tall. Be you. In all of your power.

And yes, I still wish to guide, and inspire people. Help people. But I’ve realised that the only way to help and inspire other humans is to stay true to myself, and not to be afraid to show my most authentic self. We help others, by first helping ourselves.

Linda

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