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How to care less about what other people think

”The world does not revolve around you and your world shouldn’t revolve around the opinion of others towards you.”

Why should we stop worrying about what other people think about us? Because, most of the time humans are caught up in their own thoughts and concerns, mainly thinking about themselves.

The world does not revolve around you.

A study from Harvard University shows that humans spend most of their time thinking and talking about themselves. Researches conducted a series of experiments to asses how much people liked talking about themselves and why. No matter the test, the researchers found the results pointed the same way: humans get a biochemical buzz from self-disclosure. (Luscombe, 2012).

Maybe it’s because most of the time we’re preoccupied by our own lives, that we assume that somehow other people must be as well. Newsflash – they’re precisely as you – mostly busy thinking about themselves. This is not us being selfish – it’s us being rather human.

With this being said, not caring about what other people think shouldn’t involve you being totally ignorant towards other peoples’ wants and desires.

”How much someone cares about what others think depends—or should depend—on the nature of their relationship.” (Neuman, 2013).

Caring about what your closest friends, family members and collegues/bosses think about you is to some extent very important. Of course you would like to know if you by mistake offended or disrespected someone. You want to be able to have an open dialouge with the people in your life with whom you spend most of your time.

However, if you constantly go around worrying about what others might think about your dreams and desires – comparing yourself to others and judging yourself for not being good enough – then you need to understand; this is not a mindset that will bring you forward.

Below you’ll find 5 ways that hopefully might help you care less about what other people think, and care more about what you actually desire out of life.

5 ways to care less what other people think

Concentrate on yourself

Let’s say you’re thinking about starting a side hustle. Instead of focusing on what you have to offer, you find yourself scrolling through other peoples’ lives, ending up comparing your weaknesses to their strengths. Or you spend your time worrying about what people might say when you finally launch your idea. Rather, redirect the focus back to you – what is it that you’re good at? How can you help or assist others with your skills? What are your interests? It’s vital to do a competitive analysis in case you’re launching your own business – you need to know who you’re competing against, and from there focus on your unique selling point. However, don’t let it distract you from concentrating on yourself and your ideas.

Stay true to your values

The clearer you are about your own set of values, the less you will care about what others think of you. If you’re authentic and honest in the way you’re presenting yourself you will start to feel more confident. Constantly feeling that you have to please others is both time consuming and self-deprecating. If you notice that others won’t like you if you start creating healthy boundaries, and staying true to yourself, then you need to realise that those migth not be your humans. Stay true to your values, the things that are deply rooted within your soul, and you will notice how other peoples’ opinions don’t seem to bother you anymore.

Surround yourself with people you love

As mentioned above, caring about what your closest friends and family members think of you is to some extent something you shouldn’t neglect. However, with a strong connection comes the feelings of comfort and security, withouth the fear of being judged. Therefore, surround yourself with people who care about you, and that want to see you succeed at life. Keep them close to your heart, and let them know that they too are allowed to be exactly who they are.

Share your own story

We all have our own stories to share. Something that might assist another human on his/her journey. You might have gone through something that is similar to what someone is going through right now. Sharing experiences help us feel less alone, and more connected. You might think that your story is nothing to be shared, and no, you don’t have to share your story with the whole world. However, you can start to share it within a smaller group of people, and from there notice how it might benefit another soul, in the most beautiful, authentic way.

Let yourself be inspired

It’s a wonderful feeling when you find yourself being deeply inspired by another human. When you’re inspired by someone’s talents, skills or personality I believe it’s a sign that you have something similar within yourself. Something that you haven’t been able to put forth, simply because you might think that you’re not capable of doing it. Let yourself be inspired – but don’t let it distract you from your own dreams. Instead, let it help you guide you towards your own truth.

References:

Neuman, F. (2013) Caring What Other People Think. Accessed from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/fighting-fear/201306/caring-what-other-people-think

Luscombe, B. (2012) Why We Talk About Ourselves: The Brain Likes It. Accessed from: https://healthland.time.com/2012/05/08/why-we-overshare-the-brain-likes-it/

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